One of the principles of LEAN (taken from the Toyota Production System) is the notion of striving for perfection. The theory highlights the impact of defects with statistics – if 1% of the 2 million new vehicles sold in Canada each year have a defect it would mean that 20,000 Canadians bought a lemon!

This made me think what a 1% defect rate looks like in my work.

If 1% of my time spent in meetings this week is unproductive then I have lost 24 minutes. Although some meetings are better than others I think most people would agree that the “defect” rates in meetings are much higher than 1%. The idea of losing 24 minutes for each 1% increment multiplied by the number of participants in each meeting quickly adds to something mindbogglingly wasteful!

If 1% of my emails contain an error each week I am sending 5 emails with incorrect information. Am I really so careful that 99% of my emails are error free? What if it is critical information in one of the 5 emails containing an error? What if an email with an error goes to my boss? Or what if my error-filled email gets forwarded several times or goes to the president of the company?

If 1% of the laundry I do shrinks or is damaged in the process I will need to replace 2 articles of clothes each week! This might not be problematic if it is a lost sock that needs replacing but what if it is the $80 Hugo Boss polo shirt and the one and only baseball uniform?

From a numbers perspective sometimes 1% doesn’t sound all that staggering but to the one person who is on the receiving end of the error, it could be a really big deal.

Outside Eyes

At work this week I was a guest at a process improvement planning event. I was not familiar with the work area or the leaders so was unsure of the issues or the level of commitment to any identified changes. As a consultant, this isn’t new to me. In my regular job I also function as a consultant – an internal consultant or as I like to describe it – an outside insider to the areas I support or the projects I lead.

The value of outsider's eyes is threefold:

1. Having curious participants who are not invested in any process or outcome helps everyone open their perspectives on something they are too close to see clearly anymore.

2. Innocent (or not so innocent) questions from the outsider are met with less defensiveness and can spark some dynamic dialogue

3. Having an insider explain a process to an outsider using simple language can help to highlight waste and workarounds.

Being an outsider and learning about new areas is one of the things I love most about my job and about my consulting work through Tree Toad.

On Valentine’s Day, I wrote about the love lessons that Toad has taught me. Toad knows that love carries across distance and across time. He knows that love is a choice and that love grows when you give it away. He also demonstrates every day that you don’t have to wait to love.

I was pondering this the other day as I found myself with two extra boys in my care after baseball One of the boys is his best buddy who was coming over for a sleepover while his folks went out for the evening. The other boy, J, Toad had just met the day before when J got called up to our baseball team for a tournament. There was a last minute decision to do a team dinner after the third game and this new boy said he wanted to come but his Dad could not bring him. The Toad patted him on the back and without hesitation said “No worries – you can just come with us, right Mom?” and just like that, I was plus 2 for little boys!

Later that day the doorbell rang and one of the boys from the ‘hood showed up to play with the Toad. He was here for about 10 minutes when they arrived in the kitchen telling me he was hungry. I just smiled as I listed the options for a snack – boys are ALWAYS hungry. He happily grabbed a couple of granola bars before heading outside again.

After that, I was thinking about a conversation with the Big Bear Cubs when we were reflecting on their year here with us. We were talking about them coming back for a visit and I said: “you will always have a home with us at the Yellow Castle – the code on the front door will always work for you.” True for the Big Bear cub who has shared our home and true for the Biggest Bear cub who we adopted along the way.

I thought back to last summer when the exchange student from high school came to visit with her husband and children. It was like no time had passed and we were once again connected as a family. Our children felt that immediately as they bridged across three languages English, French and Italian to have tons of fun and adventures together. My sister reminded me recently that 30+ years ago when a high school friend had a challenging home situation he came to our house to sort through some things – and he ended up staying with us for 2 years!

Seems the Toad learned his lessons on love epigenetically!

The Yellow Castle is all about sports – all the time. We had a large NHL playoff bracket posted by the fireplace for the last 6 weeks with a homemade duct tape replica of the Stanley Cup on the mantle. We had a Game 7 “feast” as we watched the game and the winner of the pool – the Big Bear Cub  - was presented the Stanley Cup to hoist high overhead. We were also glued to the TV for the Raptors playoff run.

This is also the time of year when there are lots of finals in my personal life – we just had the last game of the Toad’s Mosquito baseball career and later this week his Atom hockey career will be over as well. In another week we will take the “last day of Grade 5” photo to add to the timeline of school photos.

Last night the bigger bear cubs finished their Canadian Midget hockey careers. I might have wept through warm-up and had a few tears with each goal they scored. They have picked up on my barely controlled emotions and are being even more sweet, and affectionate. They are also way more tolerant of me snapping millions of photos to capture our “finals” – even the final trip to the DQ as a hug.

I do not want to wish a single, valuable, and precious second of this season of finals away – and will work hard to stay in the moment – even the sad ones. I know that a season of firsts will cycle around again and I will savour those moments when they arrive.

The Toad and I are both strong introverts. We have conversations regularly about how difficult he finds it to use his voice and to be heard. We talk about rehearsing what he wants to say in order to build confidence, experimenting using his voice in situations he feels safer in or more positive about and having his voice heard in other ways (through another person/spokesperson or in writing). Finding his voice remains a work in progress.

I recently participated in a process that was out of my comfort zone that I needed to use my voice – the issues were important and for me the stakes were high. I persevered through the discomfort and using all the techniques listed above made sure my voice was heard. In the end, being heard and being listened to are two very different things.

As I process the impacts of that difference I have made a note to myself that I likely need to prepare the Toad for a similar situation.

I am struck by the profound difference in two recent road trips. Both involved long drives and both had loud music. One was a solitary trip and the other involved my hug of bear cubs.

On my drive alone I noticed more outside the car – the sun sparkling on the lake, the guy with the funny hair in the car beside me at the stoplight and the gorgeous well-trained dog who crossed the road with his owner in front of me.

When my hug (a family of teddy bears) was with me I noticed more inside the car – the eyes that sparkled when a favourite song came on, the deepening voice of the big bear cub and the brotherly interactions between the 3 cubs. I also noticed more inside of me – the swell of pride watching the three of them together, the belly laugh that came out with the singing of the lyrics and the tears that gathered occasionally as I realized the 2 bear cubs would leaving the hug very, very soon.

Who would have ever thought car karaoke would become such a precious memory.

I haven’t posted on my Tree Toad platforms for more than 2 weeks…… I am not sure that anyone has even noticed quite honestly.

For more than a year I have diligently posted about life and work. These weekly postings were a promise to myself to work on developing my consultant business brand and to improve my skills and comfort level around writing.

The first time I missed posting I had a large wave of guilt about my broken promise. The second missed post I had no guilt – my missed posts were a direct result of spending my time playing, having fun and making memories with my hug (our family of teddy bears). The 2 big bear cubs will leave us in a little more than 30 days so I am acutely aware of the march of time and making the most of moments. I will always choose the cubs over a blank sheet of paper or computer screen.

And for the record, I have written quite a bit in the last couple of weeks because the cubs always have great perspective and lessons for me – I just didn’t choose to use my time sitting in front of the computer long enough to actually post anything.

Touch is the first sense that is developed as an infant and is in many ways the first language we learn. Studies have revealed that many significant and nuanced emotions can be transmitted via touch. The language of touch is different across cultures – with warmer climates being more “touchy”. As a language we are often more proficient as children in the communication of touch – as we mature the skill seems to get lost in the confusion of hidden agendas, trauma, fear and other grown up complexities.

I have recently had my attention drawn to the language of touch in my world – it wasn’t something I noticed or thought much about before. One of the ways it has come into my consciousness is related to the concept of consent. As the Momma I recognize it is my responsibility to ensure the Toad understands consent and respect for decisions related to his body and space as well as the decisions of others. In this context I now recognize that we are in fact a pretty “hands-on” family. We snuggle every day, we hug hello and goodbye as well as spontaneous random moments each day,  I frequently kiss a head, rub a back or pat an arm as I pass or if I need to ask a question or gain attention. Up until now largely unconscious…… including some of the touch that has spilled into other parts of my life – with other family members, friends and even work colleagues!

My attention has also been drawn to those moments when someone else touches me – the importance of it for both of us, the meaning it brings, the honour of someone trusting me with that touch and the gift that touch can be.

 I am now not only more conscious of the power of touch I am also more grateful for the gift of touch in my world.

My favourite number is 3, so when Hugh Culver’s (CEO blogworks) gratitude practice had 3 elements with a list of 3 in each, it caught my eye! His practice is as follows:

• 3 amazing things that happened yesterday
• 3 things I am grateful for
• 3 things that would make today great

These are questions I ask the Toad most nights as we are curled up in bed just after the lights go out. It is a special moment to be able to hold your child and listen to the excitement as he shares his perspective on amazing things in his world. It is something I look forward to every day and am so very grateful for.

I am not big on New Year’s resolutions…… mostly because the length of time I beat myself about breaking them is exponentially longer than the time I actually stick with them. This year I tried a different approach based on something I read on the blog of a friend and colleague

The approach used the numbers in 2019 to set several differently focused intentions for the whole year as follows:

2 – name two things you want to focus on doing better

0 – name something you want to never this year

1 – name one thing you are going to stop doing

9 – name nine things you want to accomplish this year

I have these intentions listed on my bathroom wall where I can see them every day. This is a great motivator and also reminds me of events that are coming up that I can look forward to.

One of my intentions was to paddle this year from March through to October. Paddling is my powerful and peaceful place. I have been so excited (and nervous) watching the weather and the lake temperature and anticipating the opportunity to be out on the water.

On March 28, 2019, with the sun shining and the lake at 4.4c, I paddled for 40 minutes! The lake was all mine, except for the Canada geese, the ducks and a majestic eagle!

It feels great to live into an intention set months ago and motivates me even further to pay attention to the other eight intentions.